Why torture yourself.?

I am just so angry at my friend right now.
Beware! This is a rant post. You can stop reading now or read if you think you can handle me.

I remember once when my best friend told us that he just wished, he didn't grew old. Well, at that point I was really mad at him, for being so foolish at such a young age, wanting to not live till the very end. I was so angry at him, that after all the effort I put to make him feel better day and night seemed so worthless. I was so angry at him, for making me feel like a failure. A failure that I couldn't make my best friend feel so much better after his heart was broken. I realize that we all managed to talked sense into his head and now he is in good shape and smart enough to know what he can handle and what he can't.

I feel like I am going through the whole situation over again, with another friend of mine. (What is this with my friends. Gosh). How could you be so naive about everything. Why do you get yourself into something that you know you can't handle. Why do you make me feel like an horrible friend. Why the fuck you don't know that this is too much for you, and everyone around you. For your parents. FOR ME?! Like why are you being like this. I really wanna be there for you. Help you through this situation even though I don't agree to it. I am making an effort to make sure you are alright, but you are not giving me a fucking chance. To make things better for you because I love you too much that I don't want you to be in this situation. Why aren't you giving me chance to be there for you, to make your days better, so that you don't feel miserable?

Being in a relationship is suppose to make us happy most of the time, that when the person is not around, you suppose to be alright, not all caught up and feel it like a burden if your significant other is not right beside you. No matter, how far you guys are, you should be feeling happy and not crappy. Okay maybe you can tell me that I don't know how it feels to be in a relationship, because I never had a serious one, but I know how is it like, because seeing everyone me makes me learn so much more. And seeing this, how miserable you are makes me more afraid of being in a committed relationship. Why do you make such beautiful thing so hard on yourself. What is that about this, that you have to torture yourself. Sleepless night, and having a conversation and seeing this person you love once in a blue moon. Like really. Why are you missing out on what teenagers do? Why are you torturing yourself and your significant other.

You know, not everyone can go to the moon, and thats the thing you have to understand.

Doesn't mean another person can do it, you can too. You know where you stand. And why just torture yourself. Seriously .

Why.?


xx