Nostalgic - at the beginning this word, was very alien to me, and the more I talked to people, I tend to try to fit this word and now I know, what does it mean, how does it feel like.
i am now still watching The Voice Finale. And I was just listening and decided to note my thought now, as this is something I always thought off. And Tony Lucca sang with his coach, Adam Levine. They sang Yesterday by The Beatles.
And this made me remember memories when I was young. Our trips, and how he exposed us to his music. From Beatles to Alleycats. And i realize, how I wish I was just 8 forever, yes 8 forever, not 21 forever, I miss those nights he comes in my room and put the blanket on us and give us a kiss on the cheek and as we grow up, both of us. Age made us distant.
Now, its all serious business conversation, so that I don't do mistake. Theres no more room, for me to screw up and he comes tell me, its okay, your still small. Now if I screw up its all lecture, I miss those times where he was the hero. I mean he still is the hero in my life, but I guess he wants us to know that no one stays together forever.
That I need to go out, independent and be a strong lady and an intelligent one. So that, when we are on our own, we know whats right and what right. I feel bait down that he is just letting us go on with outlives, instead of him being in it and creating better ones, no matter how old I am.
Its been forever, since I had a really good fruitful conversation with my papa. Maybe its me, that I don't put effort and spare time to talk to him. Or its just him, don't want to give me room to try. Maybe sometimes I'm trying but I just don't realize that I am trying because, this situation, talking to dad, is not something you need to try. So when I try, it really doesn't seem like i'm trying.
As it is for now, I'm gonna just continue trying.
to put a smile
and create a great memory
to cherish
a lifetime.
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